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Message: <blockquote data-quote="vic" data-source="post: 60568">STUPID CRIMINAL STORIES  The owner of the Takin' Care of Business cleaning service reportedly did first-class work on his job at Richmond International Airport in Virginia. As it turns out, he was cleaning up in more ways than one. The man managed to steal several thousand dollars from a United Airlines drop safe with a little help from his vacuum cleaner. Richmond police say the man used the vacuum's hose to suck up cash, checks, and credit card receipts from the narrow drop slot of the safe during his nightly rounds. When the deposits began disappearing, bewildered airport authorities set up a surveillance camera near the safe, and managed to videotape the cleaning man in the act of "takin' care of business."  A Lubbock, TX man who was arrested for threatening his family may face additional charges. Police say that while being booked for the original assault, the man called his wife from the police station and threatened to kill her as soon as he was released. Unfortunately for the suspect, jail authorities were listening in on the conversation.  A man in Ontario, Canada returned home one evening to find his more valuable and easily-fenced goodies stacked neatly beside the door. When the homeowner saw the living room was also spattered with blood, he feared the worst for his beloved house pet, a large African parrot. The parrot was alive, though in a nasty mood, and investigators determined that the blood in the room hadn't come from the bird. The mystery was solved a short time later when police arrested a scratched, clawed, and thoroughly terrified burglar hiding nearby. The man told the cops he'd broken into the house when the parrot suddenly attacked him. The suspect fled empty-handed when the parrot launched an all-out attack on his eyes. The man told police, "I'd rather go to jail than face that bird again."  A man was arrested in Westport, CN after he brought a chainsaw into a local restaurant and carved his initials into the floor. The man told police he knew the owner and was sure he would find the stunt hilarious. What he didn't know is that his friend had recently sold the restaurant to another man, who had no idea who the chainsaw-wielding comedian was.  A Brunswick, GA man pulled a residential burglary and made off with a cell phone, video game system, and digital camera. He might have gotten away with it, if he hadn't taken his own picture with the digital camera before hocking it at a local pawnshop. His image was still in the camera's memory when the victim went to the shop to identify it. She told police the man in the picture had asked her about renting a house the day of the burglary. The owner of the pawnshop positively identified the suspect as the man who had pawned the camera. After being confronted with the evidence, the man confessed to the crime.  How's this one for a frivolous lawsuit? A Georgia man is suing the makers of Liquid Fire drain cleaner for burns he suffered on his legs while using the product. Liquid Fire is normally packaged in a spill-proof container, but the man said he thought the original package looked flimsy, so he poured the contents into a homemade container of his own design. He was burned by the product after it leaked out of the "safer" homemade container. He's arguing that if the original package had looked sturdier, he wouldn't have felt the need to change containers, and thus wouldn't have gotten burned.  A student activist From Oshkosh, WI was running for the state legislature on a "privacy" platform, demanding stronger laws to protect privacy on the Internet. The candidate's campaign ended after he was arrested for stealing another man's identity and taking more than $2000 from his bank account. He was caught after a teller at the bank where the thefts took place saw him campaigning on a local television program.   An armed robber in Cedar Rapids, Iowa got his cash, fled the bank and hopped into his getaway car, no doubt pleased with himself over a job well done. The thief's vanity ended up being his undoing since the car was sporting a personalized license plate that featured the man's last name. It didn't take the cops long to find him.</blockquote>

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