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Life After Brown
Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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<blockquote data-quote="moreluck" data-source="post: 171390" data-attributes="member: 1246"><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words.</span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"></span><em></em></p><p><em><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">And the winners are:</span></em></p><p></p><ol> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>coffee</strong>, n. the person upon whom one coughs</span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>flabbergasted</strong>, adj. appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained</span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>abdicate</strong>, v. to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach</span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>esplanade</strong>, v. to attempt an explanation while drunk</span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>willy-nilly</strong>, adj. impotent</span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>negligent</strong>, adj. absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown</span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>lymph</strong>, v. to walk with a lisp</span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>gargoyle</strong>, n. olive-flavored mouthwash</span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>flatulence</strong>, n. emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller</span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>balderdash</strong>, n. a rapidly receding hairline</span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>testicle</strong>, n. a humorous question on an exam</span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>rectitude</strong>, n. the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists</span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>Pokemon</strong>, n. a Rastafarian proctologist</span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>oyster</strong>, n. a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms</span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>friend</strong><strong>risbeetarianism</strong>, n. the belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there</span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ol"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><strong>circumvent</strong>, n. an opening in the front of boxer shorts</span></span></li> </ol></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="moreluck, post: 171390, member: 1246"] [FONT=Tahoma]The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words. [/FONT][I] [FONT=Tahoma]And the winners are:[/FONT][/I] [LIST=1] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]coffee[/B], n. the person upon whom one coughs[/FONT][/SIZE] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]flabbergasted[/B], adj. appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained[/FONT][/SIZE] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]abdicate[/B], v. to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach[/FONT][/SIZE] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]esplanade[/B], v. to attempt an explanation while drunk[/FONT][/SIZE] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]willy-nilly[/B], adj. impotent[/FONT][/SIZE] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]negligent[/B], adj. absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown[/FONT][/SIZE] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]lymph[/B], v. to walk with a lisp[/FONT][/SIZE] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]gargoyle[/B], n. olive-flavored mouthwash[/FONT][/SIZE] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]flatulence[/B], n. emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller[/FONT][/SIZE] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]balderdash[/B], n. a rapidly receding hairline[/FONT][/SIZE] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]testicle[/B], n. a humorous question on an exam[/FONT][/SIZE] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]rectitude[/B], n. the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists[/FONT][/SIZE] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]Pokemon[/B], n. a Rastafarian proctologist[/FONT][/SIZE] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]oyster[/B], n. a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms[/FONT][/SIZE] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]friend[/B][B]risbeetarianism[/B], n. the belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there[/FONT][/SIZE] [*][SIZE=3][FONT=Tahoma][B]circumvent[/B], n. an opening in the front of boxer shorts[/FONT][/SIZE][/LIST] [/QUOTE]
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