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<blockquote data-quote="moreluck" data-source="post: 216534" data-attributes="member: 1246">Homeowner&#039;s Guide to Basic ToolsHammer: In ancient times, a hammer was used to inflict pain on one&#039;s enemies. Modern hammers are used to inflict pain on oneself.&nbsp;Screwdriver: The drink ordered at the local bar after you call in a professional repairman to undo the $500 in damage you did while trying to change out a light socket with your handy screwdriver.&nbsp;Phillips Screwdriver: The bar drink that you order when the damage estimate is over $1,000. Contains twice the vodka.&nbsp;Pliers: A device used to extend your reach the necessary few inches when you drop a one-of-a-kind screw down behind the new wall it took you two weeks to install.&nbsp;Electronic Stud Finder: An annoying device that never goes off when you point it at yourself.</blockquote>

[QUOTE="moreluck, post: 216534, member: 1246"] [CENTER][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#cc0000][B]Homeowner's Guide to Basic Tools[/B][/COLOR][/FONT][/CENTER] [B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#000080]Hammer: In ancient times, a hammer was used to inflict pain on one's enemies. Modern hammers are used to inflict pain on oneself.[/COLOR][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=Verdana][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#000080]Screwdriver: The drink ordered at the local bar after you call in a professional repairman to undo the $500 in damage you did while trying to change out a light socket with your handy screwdriver.[/COLOR][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=Verdana][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#000080]Phillips Screwdriver: The bar drink that you order when the damage estimate is over $1,000. Contains twice the vodka.[/COLOR][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=Verdana][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#000080]Pliers: A device used to extend your reach the necessary few inches when you drop a one-of-a-kind screw down behind the new wall it took you two weeks to install.[/COLOR][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#000080]Electronic Stud Finder: An annoying device that never goes off when you point it at yourself.[/COLOR][/FONT][/B] [/QUOTE]

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