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Life After Brown
Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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<blockquote data-quote="moreluck" data-source="post: 296138" data-attributes="member: 1246"><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as "HILLBILLIES." </span></span></span></span></span></p><p></p><p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">You must now refer to them as</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">And furthermore</span></span></span></span></span></p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:</span></span></span></span></span></p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">1 She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a </span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">"</span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">BREASTED AMERICAN."</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">2. She is not "EASY" - She is</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">"HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">3. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">"LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY." </span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">4. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">"PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">5 She does not "NAG" you - She becomes</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">"</span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">VERBALLY REPETITIVE."</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">6. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">"</span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">LOW-PRICED PROVIDER."</span></span></span></span></span></p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:</span></span></span></span></span></p><p></p><p> </p><p></p><p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a </span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">"LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY." </span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">"</span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">OVERLY CAUCASIAN."</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He</span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">"INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS." </span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">"FOLLICLE REGRESSION."</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">5. He does not act like a "SMART ASS" - He develops a case of </span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION." </span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">6. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's </span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">"REAR CLEAVAGE." </span></span></span></span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="moreluck, post: 296138, member: 1246"] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as "HILLBILLIES." [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [CENTER][FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]You must now refer to them as[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]And furthermore[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/CENTER] [CENTER][FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/CENTER] [CENTER][FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]1 She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]BREASTED AMERICAN."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]2. She is not "EASY" - She is[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]"HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]3. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]"LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY." [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]4. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]"PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]5 She does not "NAG" you - She becomes[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]VERBALLY REPETITIVE."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]6. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]LOW-PRICED PROVIDER."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/CENTER] [CENTER][FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/CENTER] [CENTER][FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]"LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY." [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]OVERLY CAUCASIAN."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]"INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS." [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]"FOLLICLE REGRESSION."[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]5. He does not act like a "SMART ASS" - He develops a case of [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION." [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]6. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=6][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]"REAR CLEAVAGE." [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/CENTER] [/QUOTE]
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