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Life After Brown
Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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<blockquote data-quote="moreluck" data-source="post: 387852" data-attributes="member: 1246"><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">Why did the chicken cross the road?</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">BARACK OBAMA</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : The chicken crossed the road because it was time for change ! </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">The chicken wanted change ! </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">JOHN MC CAIN</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">other side of the road. </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue">HILLARY CLINTON</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">right from Day One! that every chicken in this country gets the chance it </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me. </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">GEORGE W. BUSH</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here. </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">DICK CHENEY</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : Where's my gun? </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">COLIN POWELL</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">image of the chicken crossing the road. </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">BILL CLINTON</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">definition of chicken? </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">AL</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> GORE</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">: I invented the chicken. </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">JOHN KERRY</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it. </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">AL SHARPTON</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens. </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">DR. PHIL</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">realize how stupid he's acting by not taki ng on his current problems before </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">adding new problems. </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">OPRAH:</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">chickens. </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">NANCY GRACE</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty ! You can see </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">it in his eyes and the way he walks. </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">PAT BUCHANAN</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American. </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue">MARTHA STEWART</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">I had a standing order at the Farmer's Marke t to sell my eggs when the price </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information. </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">DR. SEUSS</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told. </span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">JERRY FALWELL</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side.' That chicken </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that. </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">GRANDPA:</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">told us the chicken crossed the road, a nd that was good enough. </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">BARBARA WALTERS</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">lifelong dream of crossing the road. </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">ARISTOTLE </span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road. </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">JOHN LENNON</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">peace. </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">ALBERT EINSTEIN</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move </span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">beneath the chicken? </span></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black">></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: blue"><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'">COLONEL SANDERS</span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Tahoma'"> : Did I miss one? </span></span></span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="moreluck, post: 387852, member: 1246"] [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=3][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][FONT=Tahoma]Why did the chicken cross the road?[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]>[/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]BARACK OBAMA[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : The chicken crossed the road because it was time for change ! [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]The chicken wanted change ! [/COLOR][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]JOHN MC CAIN[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]other side of the road. [/COLOR][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue]HILLARY CLINTON[/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]right from Day One! that every chicken in this country gets the chance it [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me. [/COLOR][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]GEORGE W. BUSH[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here. [/COLOR][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]DICK CHENEY[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : Where's my gun? [/FONT][/COLOR] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]COLIN POWELL[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]image of the chicken crossing the road. [/COLOR][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]BILL CLINTON[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]definition of chicken? [/COLOR][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]AL[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma] GORE[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]: I invented the chicken. [/FONT][/COLOR] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]JOHN KERRY[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it. [/COLOR][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]AL SHARPTON[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens. [/FONT][/COLOR] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]DR. PHIL[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]realize how stupid he's acting by not taki ng on his current problems before [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]adding new problems. [/COLOR][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]OPRAH:[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]chickens. [/COLOR][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]NANCY GRACE[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty ! You can see [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]it in his eyes and the way he walks. [/COLOR][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]PAT BUCHANAN[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American. [/FONT][/COLOR] [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue]MARTHA STEWART[/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]I had a standing order at the Farmer's Marke t to sell my eggs when the price [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information. [/COLOR][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]DR. SEUSS[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told. [/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]JERRY FALWELL[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side.' That chicken [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that. [/COLOR][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]GRANDPA:[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]told us the chicken crossed the road, a nd that was good enough. [/COLOR][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]BARBARA WALTERS[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]lifelong dream of crossing the road. [/COLOR][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]ARISTOTLE [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road. [/FONT][/COLOR] [/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]JOHN LENNON[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma]: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]peace. [/COLOR][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]ALBERT EINSTEIN[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move [/FONT][/COLOR] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]beneath the chicken? [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black]>[/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=blue][COLOR=blue][FONT=Tahoma]COLONEL SANDERS[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Tahoma][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Tahoma] : Did I miss one? [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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