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Life After Brown
Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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<blockquote data-quote="moreluck" data-source="post: 401310" data-attributes="member: 1246"><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">PUNSTER ALERT.........</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"> The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island. It turned out to be an optical Aleutian.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"> She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"> A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"> A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"> Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"> Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"> A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"> Atheism is a non-prophet organization.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"> Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a-head.'</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger Then it hit me.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"> A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"> A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.'</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"> A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"> It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> <span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'">. Don't join dangerous cults, practice safe sects!</span></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"> Did you hear about the woman who backed into a fan? Disaster!</span></span></span></span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="moreluck, post: 401310, member: 1246"] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial]PUNSTER ALERT.........[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial] The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial]. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island. It turned out to be an optical Aleutian.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial] She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial] A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial]. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial]. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial] A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial]. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial] Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial] Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial] A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial] Atheism is a non-prophet organization.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial] Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a-head.'[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial]. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger Then it hit me.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial] A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial] A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.'[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial] A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial] It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial]The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial]In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial]. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial]. Don't join dangerous cults, practice safe sects![/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial] Did you hear about the woman who backed into a fan? Disaster![/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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