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Life After Brown
Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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<blockquote data-quote="moreluck" data-source="post: 500102" data-attributes="member: 1246"><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'">POLITICAL AFFILIATION</span></strong></p><p> </p><p><em><span style="color: #680000"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><strong>Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Redneck? </strong></span></span></em></p><p> </p><p><em><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><strong>Here is a little test that will help you decide.</strong></span></span></em></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><strong>The answer can be found by posing the following question:</strong></span></em></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em><strong>You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.</strong></em></p><p> </p><p><em><strong>Suddenly, an Islamic </strong></em></p><p><em><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Terrorist with a huge knife comes </span></strong></em></p><p><em><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">around the corner, locks eyes with you,</span></strong></em></p><p><em><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">screams obscenities, praises </span></strong></em></p><p><em><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Allah, raises the</span></strong></em></p><p><em><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Knife and charges at you. </span></strong></em></p><p> </p><p><em><strong>You are carrying a </strong></em></p><p><em><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot. </span></strong></em></p><p> </p><p><em><strong>You have mere seconds </strong></em></p><p><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><strong>before he reaches you and your family.</strong></span></em></p><p> </p><p><em><strong><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">What do you do?</span></span></strong></em></p><p></p><p> </p><p><em><strong><u><span style="color: blue"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">THINK CAREFULLY AND </span></span></u></strong></em></p><p><u><em><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: blue"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">THEN SCROLL DOWN: </span></em></span></span></strong></em></u><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><u><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Democrat's </span></em></span></span></strong></u><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><u><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Answer</span></em></span></strong></em></u></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! </span></em></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Does the man look poor or oppressed?</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Have I ever done anything to him that </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">would inspire him to attack? </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Could we run away?</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">What does my wife </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">think?</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">What about the kids?</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Could I possibly swing the gun like a club </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">and knock the knife out of his hand? </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">What does the law say about </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">this situation? </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">of message does this send to society and to my children? </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Is it possible he'd be </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">happy with just killing me? </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Does he definitely want to kill me, or would </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">he be content just to wound me?</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">family get away while he was stabbing me?</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Should I call </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">9-1-1?</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Why is this street so deserted? </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">We need to raise taxes, have </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">paint and weed day and</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">make this happier, healthier street that </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">would discourage such behavior.</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">This is all so confusing! I need to </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">debate this with</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">some friends for few days and try to come to a </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">consensus. </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"></span></p><p><em><strong><span style="color: red"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">....................................................................... </span></span></strong></em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Republican's </span></em></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Answer:</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><u><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: blue"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">BANG!</span></em></span></span></strong></u></p><p> </p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: red"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">............................... ................................. </span></em></span></span></strong></p><p> </p><p> </p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #365f91"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Redneck's Answer:</span></em></span></span></strong></p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em><strong><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="color: #365f91"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!</span></em></span></span></strong></em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: #365f91"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">BANG ! </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: #365f91"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Click..... (Sounds of reloading)</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: #365f91"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: #365f91"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">BANG! BANG!</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: #365f91"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">BANG! Click </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: #365f91"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Daughter: 'Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those </span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: #365f91"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?! '</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: #365f91"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Son: 'Can I shoot the next one?!'</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><em><strong><span style="color: #365f91"><em><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Wife: 'You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist</span></em></span></strong></em></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="moreluck, post: 500102, member: 1246"] [B][FONT=Helvetica]POLITICAL AFFILIATION[/FONT][/B] [I][COLOR=#680000][FONT=Verdana][B]Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Redneck? [/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/I] [I][COLOR=red][FONT=Verdana][B]Here is a little test that will help you decide.[/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/I] [FONT=Verdana][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana][B]The answer can be found by posing the following question:[/B][/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/FONT] [I][B]You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.[/B][/I] [I][B]Suddenly, an Islamic [/B][/I] [I][B][FONT=Verdana]Terrorist with a huge knife comes [/FONT][/B][/I] [I][B][FONT=Verdana]around the corner, locks eyes with you,[/FONT][/B][/I] [I][B][FONT=Verdana]screams obscenities, praises [/FONT][/B][/I] [I][B][FONT=Verdana]Allah, raises the[/FONT][/B][/I] [I][B][FONT=Verdana]Knife and charges at you. [/FONT][/B][/I] [I][B]You are carrying a [/B][/I] [I][B][FONT=Verdana]Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot. [/FONT][/B][/I] [I][B]You have mere seconds [/B][/I] [I][FONT=Verdana][B]before he reaches you and your family.[/B][/FONT][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][FONT=Verdana]What do you do?[/FONT][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][U][COLOR=blue][FONT=Verdana]THINK CAREFULLY AND [/FONT][/COLOR][/U][/B][/I] [U][I][B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=blue][I][FONT=Verdana]THEN SCROLL DOWN: [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][/I][/U][FONT=Verdana] [/FONT] [U][B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]Democrat's [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][/U][FONT=Verdana] [U][I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]Answer[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I][/U][/FONT] [B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][FONT=Verdana] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]Does the man look poor or oppressed?[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]Have I ever done anything to him that [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]would inspire him to attack? [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]Could we run away?[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]What does my wife [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]think?[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]What about the kids?[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]Could I possibly swing the gun like a club [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]and knock the knife out of his hand? [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]What does the law say about [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]this situation? [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]of message does this send to society and to my children? [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]Is it possible he'd be [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]happy with just killing me? [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]Does he definitely want to kill me, or would [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]he be content just to wound me?[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]family get away while he was stabbing me?[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]Should I call [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]9-1-1?[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]Why is this street so deserted? [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]We need to raise taxes, have [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]paint and weed day and[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]make this happier, healthier street that [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]would discourage such behavior.[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]This is all so confusing! I need to [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]debate this with[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]some friends for few days and try to come to a [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]consensus. [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [/FONT] [I][B][COLOR=red][FONT=Verdana]....................................................................... [/FONT][/COLOR][/B][/I] [B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]Republican's [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][FONT=Verdana] [I][B][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]Answer:[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I][/FONT] [U][B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=blue][I][FONT=Verdana]BANG![/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][/U] [B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=red][I][FONT=Verdana]............................... ................................. [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#365f91][I][FONT=Verdana]Redneck's Answer:[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/FONT][/B] [I][B][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=#365f91][I][FONT=Verdana]BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG![/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][/I][FONT=Verdana] [I][B][COLOR=#365f91][I][FONT=Verdana]BANG ! [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=#365f91][I][FONT=Verdana]Click..... (Sounds of reloading)[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=#365f91][I][FONT=Verdana]BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=#365f91][I][FONT=Verdana]BANG! BANG![/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=#365f91][I][FONT=Verdana]BANG! Click [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=#365f91][I][FONT=Verdana]Daughter: 'Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those [/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=#365f91][I][FONT=Verdana]the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?! '[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=#365f91][I][FONT=Verdana]Son: 'Can I shoot the next one?!'[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I] [I][B][COLOR=#365f91][I][FONT=Verdana]Wife: 'You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist[/FONT][/I][/COLOR][/B][/I][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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