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Life After Brown
Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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<blockquote data-quote="moreluck" data-source="post: 507653" data-attributes="member: 1246"><p style="text-align: center"><strong><u><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: navy"><span style="color: navy"><strong>AP</strong></span></span></span></span></u></strong><strong><u><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>HORISM:</strong></span></span></span></span></u></strong></p><p></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p></p><p style="text-align: center"><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>1. The nicest thing about the future is that it always starts tomorrow.</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p><p></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>2. Money will buy a fine dog, but only kindness will make him wag his tail.</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>3. If you don't have a sense of humor, you probably don't have any sense at all.</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>4. Seat belts are not as confining as wheelchairs.</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p> </p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>5. A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p> </p><p> </p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>6. How come it takes so little time for a child who is afraid</strong></span></span></span></span></strong> </p><p> </p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>of the dark to become a teenager who wants </strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p> </p><p> </p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>to stay out all night?</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>7. Business conventions are important because they demonstrate how many people a company </strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>can operate without.</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>8. Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks?</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>9. Scratch a cat and you will have a permanent job.</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>10. No one has more driving ambition than the boy who wants to buy a car.</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>11. There are no new sins; the old ones just get more publicity.</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>12. There are worse things than getting a call for a wrong </strong></span></span></span></span><span style="color: #002060"></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #002060"><strong><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="color: #002060">number at 4 AM. It could be a right number.</span></span></span></strong></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>13. No one ever says 'It's only a game.' when their team is winning.</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>14. I've reached the age where the happy hour is a nap.</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>15. Be careful reading the fine print. There's no way you're going to like it.</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>16. The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>17. Do you realize that in about 40 years, we'll have thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos? </strong></span></span></span></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>(And rap music will be the Golden Oldies!)</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>18. Money can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Corvette than in a Yugo.</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: #002060"><span style="color: #002060"><strong>19. After 50, if you don't wake up aching in every joint, you are probably dead!!</strong></span></span></span></span></strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica'"><span style="color: black"></span></span><p style="text-align: center"><strong><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="color: red"><span style="color: red"><strong>20. Always be yourself because the people that matter </strong></span></span></span></span></strong><strong><span style="color: red"></span></strong></p><p style="text-align: center"><strong><span style="color: red"><strong><span style="font-size: 18px"><span style="font-family: 'Century Gothic'"><span style="color: red">don't mind, and the ones who mind, don't matter</span></span></span></strong></p></p> <p style="text-align: center"></span><p style="text-align: center"></p></p> <p style="text-align: center"></strong><p style="text-align: center"></p></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p> <p style="text-align: center"></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="moreluck, post: 507653, member: 1246"] [CENTER][B][U][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=navy][COLOR=navy][B]AP[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/U][/B][B][U][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]HORISM:[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/U][/B][B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][/CENTER] [CENTER][B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]1. The nicest thing about the future is that it always starts tomorrow.[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [/CENTER] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]2. Money will buy a fine dog, but only kindness will make him wag his tail.[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]3. If you don't have a sense of humor, you probably don't have any sense at all.[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]4. Seat belts are not as confining as wheelchairs.[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]5. A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]6. How come it takes so little time for a child who is afraid[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]of the dark to become a teenager who wants [/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]to stay out all night?[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]7. Business conventions are important because they demonstrate how many people a company [/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]can operate without.[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]8. Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks?[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]9. Scratch a cat and you will have a permanent job.[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]10. No one has more driving ambition than the boy who wants to buy a car.[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]11. There are no new sins; the old ones just get more publicity.[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]12. There are worse things than getting a call for a wrong [/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][COLOR=#002060] [B][SIZE=5][FONT=Century Gothic][COLOR=#002060]number at 4 AM. It could be a right number.[/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE][/B][/COLOR][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]13. No one ever says 'It's only a game.' when their team is winning.[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]14. I've reached the age where the happy hour is a nap.[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]15. Be careful reading the fine print. There's no way you're going to like it.[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]16. The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]17. Do you realize that in about 40 years, we'll have thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos? [/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B](And rap music will be the Golden Oldies!)[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]18. Money can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Corvette than in a Yugo.[/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=#002060][COLOR=#002060][B]19. After 50, if you don't wake up aching in every joint, you are probably dead!![/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/FONT][CENTER][B][FONT=Century Gothic][SIZE=5][COLOR=red][COLOR=red][B]20. Always be yourself because the people that matter [/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][B][COLOR=red] [CENTER][B][SIZE=5][FONT=Century Gothic][COLOR=red]don't mind, and the ones who mind, don't matter[/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE][/B][/CENTER][/COLOR][CENTER][/center][/B][CENTER][/CENTER] [/CENTER] [/QUOTE]
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Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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