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Life After Brown
Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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<blockquote data-quote="moreluck" data-source="post: 686549" data-attributes="member: 1246"><p><strong><strong><u><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">It's Hell getting Old</span></span></span></span></u></strong></strong><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> </span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> </span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">OLD people have problems that you haven't </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">even considered yet! </span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> </span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">An 85-year-old man was requested by his </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">D</span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">octor for a sperm count as part of his physical </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">exam. </span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">The doctor gave the man a jar and said, 'Take </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">this jar home and bring back a semen sample </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">tomorrow.' </span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">which was as clean and empty as on the </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">previous day. </span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">The doctor asked what happened and the man </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">explained, 'Well, doc, it's like this -- first I tried </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">with my left hand, but still nothing. </span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">'Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in,</span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">then with her teeth out, still nothing. </span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">'We even called up Arleen, the lady next door </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">and she tried too, first with both hands, then an </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">armpit, and she even tried squeezin' it between </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">her knees, but still nothing.' </span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">The doctor was shocked! <strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">'You asked your </span></strong></strong></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><strong><strong><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">neighbor?' </span></span></span></span></strong></strong><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> </span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">The old man replied, 'Yep, none of us could get </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span></p><p> <span style="font-size: 10px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"></span></span></span><span style="font-size: 22px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black">the friggin' jar open.</span></span></span></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="moreluck, post: 686549, member: 1246"] [B][B][U][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]It's Hell getting Old[/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/U][/B][/B][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] OLD people have problems that you haven't [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]even considered yet! An 85-year-old man was requested by his [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]D[/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]octor for a sperm count as part of his physical [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, 'Take [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]this jar home and bring back a semen sample [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]tomorrow.' The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]which was as clean and empty as on the [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]previous day. The doctor asked what happened and the man [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]explained, 'Well, doc, it's like this -- first I tried [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]with my left hand, but still nothing. 'Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in,[/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]then with her teeth out, still nothing. 'We even called up Arleen, the lady next door [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]and she tried too, first with both hands, then an [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]armpit, and she even tried squeezin' it between [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]her knees, but still nothing.' The doctor was shocked! [B][B][FONT=Times New Roman]'You asked your [/FONT][/B][/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][B][B][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]neighbor?' [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/B][/B][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] The old man replied, 'Yep, none of us could get [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=2][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=6][COLOR=black][COLOR=black]the friggin' jar open.[/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE] [FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=#000000][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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Heard Any Good Ones: Part 2
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