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<blockquote data-quote="moreluck" data-source="post: 1723101" data-attributes="member: 1246">IDIOTS &amp; GEOGRAPHYAfter interviewing a particularly short-spoken job candidate, I described the person to my boss as rather monosyllabic. My boss said, &quot;Really? Where is Monosyllabia?&quot;. Thinking that he was just kidding, I played along and said that it was just south of Elbonia. He replied, &quot;Oh, you mean over by Croatia?&quot;&nbsp;ADVICE FOR IDIOTSAn actual tip from page 16 of the Hewlett Packard Environmental, Health &amp; Safety Handbook for Employees: &quot;Blink your eyelids periodically to lubricate your eyes.&quot;&nbsp;IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOODI live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: Many deer were being hit by cars and he no longer wanted them to cross there.IDIOTS &amp; COMPUTERSMy neighbor works in the operations department in the central office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him when they have problems with their computers. One night he got a call from a woman in one of the branch banks who had this question: &quot;I&#039;ve got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?&quot;IDIOTS ARE EASY TO PLEASEI was sitting in my science class, when the teacher commented that the next day would be the shortest day of the year. My lab partner became visibly excited, cheering and clapping. I explained to her that the amount of daylight changes, not the actual amount of time. Needless to say, she was very disappointed.IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICEMy daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the individual behind the counter for &quot;minimal lettuce.&quot; He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.AN IDIOT&#039;S IDIOTPolice in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. The message &quot;He&#039;s lying&quot; was placed in the copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn&#039;t telling the truth. Believing the &quot;lie detector&quot; was working, the suspect confessed.</blockquote>

[QUOTE="moreluck, post: 1723101, member: 1246"] IDIOTS & GEOGRAPHY After interviewing a particularly short-spoken job candidate, I described the person to my boss as rather monosyllabic. My boss said, "Really? Where is Monosyllabia?". Thinking that he was just kidding, I played along and said that it was just south of Elbonia. He replied, "Oh, you mean over by Croatia?" ADVICE FOR IDIOTS An actual tip from page 16 of the Hewlett Packard Environmental, Health & Safety Handbook for Employees: "Blink your eyelids periodically to lubricate your eyes." IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: Many deer were being hit by cars and he no longer wanted them to cross there. IDIOTS & COMPUTERS My neighbor works in the operations department in the central office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him when they have problems with their computers. One night he got a call from a woman in one of the branch banks who had this question: "I've got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?" IDIOTS ARE EASY TO PLEASE I was sitting in my science class, when the teacher commented that the next day would be the shortest day of the year. My lab partner became visibly excited, cheering and clapping. I explained to her that the amount of daylight changes, not the actual amount of time. Needless to say, she was very disappointed. IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the individual behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg. AN IDIOT'S IDIOT Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. The message "He's lying" was placed in the copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed. [/QUOTE]

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