Retirees in the Buff

[moreluck]

I AM A SEENAGER (Senior teenager)

I have everything that I wanted as a teenager, only 50 years later.
• I don’t have to go to school or work.
• I get an allowance every month.
• I have my own pad.
• I don’t have a curfew.
• I have a driver’s license and my own car.
• And I don’t have acne.
Life is Good!

 

[moreluck]

An old couple were talking. The wife asked her husband, "How many women have you slept with?"

"Only you, Darling,” the man replied proudly. “With all the others I was awake."

 

[oldngray]

 

[moreluck]

I just ordered a Life Alert bracelet so if I get a life, I'll be notified immediately!

 

[moreluck]

Childhood Injuries:
Fell off my bike
Fell out of a tree
Twisted my ankle

Adult Injuries:
Slept wrong
Sat down too long
Sneezed too hard

 

[moreluck]

I don't trip......I do random gravity checks.

 

[moreluck]

Why can't I be comforted by carrots? Why does it have to be chocolate??

 

[moreluck]

If you're happy and you know it it's your meds!

 

[moreluck]

My favorite colors are:
black, dark black,
pitch black, pastel black,
light black and faded black.

 

[moreluck]

 

[moreluck]

I'm retired but I work part-time as a pain in the ass.

 

[moreluck]

Middleburg Hgts Ohio (feeder dept.) Retiree, Harry Perella died (77)

 

[moreluck]

My GPS has learned to say "Your other left."

 

[moreluck]

I'm a member of the CSI team.....Can't Stand Idiots!

 

[moreluck]

So when is this "old enough to know better" suppose to kick in?

 

[moreluck]

Stop petting my peeves!!

 

[moreluck]

Wait! I do not snore! I dream I'm a motorcycle!

 

[moreluck]

I didn't mean to push all your buttons. I
was just looking for 'mute'.

 

[moreluck]

Sometimes it takes me all day to get something done.

 

[moreluck]

I don't care what people think of me. I'm busy. I've got magical to do.