Wally

BrownCafe Innovator & King of Puns
I had the classic "Drifter" as a helper yesterday. The fool had a series of crappy jobs. He lands a job with the county DPW with good benefits and pension and quits after 8 months? He said his boss was pressuring him to get a CDL. What an idiot. They rake in OT off hours salting/plowing!
 

ColdHarvest

Well-Known Member
The veteran...

Spent 20 years during the cold war with real tip of the spear assignments like motor t in Frankfurt, or the S-1 shop in Seoul, somehow found a reason to not be in the first Gulf mistake.

Rusty Ford ranger covered in "I served" stickers. Asks for vet discount at lunch, "Desert Storm era vet" hat cover placed nicely on his bald head.

Complains about millennials, who don't bitch half as much as he does.

I used to think hell was my ex wife. This guy takes the cake.
 

Wally

BrownCafe Innovator & King of Puns
Refresh for 2019...

After many years of working with Drivers Helpers, I feel comfortable in sharing some observations. Patterns suggest we can group them into key groups. Of course, I'm not a psychologist, nor, do I play one on TV, however, having said that, here are my observations in no special order.

The Collegiate- The "collegiate" is a college student. Home from break, he is eager to earn money. Smart, young, and hard working, this type makes a excellent helper. They pick up fast and need little guidance. They adjust rapidly making smart calls such as moving toward the truck and waiting on the right side of the street saving the driver time.

The MOM- The "Mom" often is a stay at home mom with children now at the age where she can leave them alone for some time. The job of helper seems exciting, fun, even challenging. She often shows up wearing makeup and perfume, and the pants never seem to fit right. She will start the day asking, "what time will we be done"(?), worried that she has to be home by 5 PM to drive little ones to ballet or hockey. The "Mom talks all day about her kids until the driver is stabbing his ears. This helper type often packs huge lunches and goodies.

The Drifter- The "Drifter" has had at least 20 jobs even thought he is only 24 years old. Under closer examination, you will find he left those jobs because the boss was "screwing" him somehow. The drifter works slow, very slow. Quite often, this type will walk the wrong way while making a delivery despite you pointing the opposite direction. He will not show during inclement weather or in case of hangover. Despite lack of funds, this type has a nice cell phone which, he will try to use all day. He can be spotted driving a 15 year old car with major dents.

Lost in Space- This type thinks somehow, this job will lead to full time employment. They work as a helper but keep wondering when they will start driving.

Sports Radio- This type very quickly will talk sports, usually football this time of the year. Before long, an amazing reportorial of facts, stats, and names come forth. No need for a radio with this type. This type can be a good worker, but the driver must be sure to halt any and all chat at delivery time.

False Santa- Somehow, this type thinks they can earn a whole lot of shopping money with this job. Problem is, they start in mid December. They usually had the idea of working more hours to earn the money they need.

Nick O' Teen- This type really loves the coffin nails. Often seen getting "one last drag" at pick up. His first words will be, "Can I smoke"? Often, this type is a off shoot of "The Drifter" type. Despite lack of funds, there is always money for the cell phone and the smokes.
 

Wally

BrownCafe Innovator & King of Puns
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Gabba

It's a vicious cycle
you forgot the kind of over eager helper that wants to help in every other way than carrying packages. they want to tell you what your next stop is, which way you should go, where to park. they want to get the next package from the back just as you're shutting the bulkhead door. they try to follow you to the back to help you select a package rather than get out and be ready to walk one to the door.
 
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