I can't even imagine what it would be like to be married to a UPS driver!

[705red]

You may also find that being married to someone in some other job may give you the same results. Husbands getting home late etc. UPS is not the only act in town but at the same time there are many jobs out there where you could work the same hours and earn less. In my neighborhood the neighbors come home around 5 pm but they are generally leaving the house around 5:30 to 6 am. Adds up to the same number of hours when you count em up.

Tie guy what time do you think most ups drivers leave there houses at?About 6 to 630 is the average out the door time for an 8 830 start.Its not easy missing family events,wondering how the wife is doing getting 3 kids dressed and out the door to take them to school,shopping,lunch,etc.Very few women can tolerate this life style,so if you have 1 make her feel like shes on a pedistal.

 

[xkingx]

this is on my mind everyday...I feel so guilty, me being the mother and missing out on my toddler growing up..Missing the first school musicals, missing the sport practices..Missing parents days..on and on

Ive been given my verbal and written warning for calling out because of my childs event or child being sick..Might be wrong to say, but Ive told them more than once..If put in the position again, i will chose my child over the job..
youre right, who pays that type of money yearly to someone who doesnt have a degree..

Good thing I dont live like I make that type of money.

 

[toonertoo]

xkingx, I cannot even imagine as I have said before, doing this job when the kids are little. I applaud you.

I was lucky enough to have worked the preload so I got to go to most of the stuff in the daytime. The trade off was I didnt make as much. Even then I wanted full time but couldnt get it, and Im glad I didnt til they were in high school. I thought then it would be nice to have more money to have more stuff. But kids are very understanding. They will understand why you werent there. Not like you were sitting in a bar, and couldnt make it. They will know you were trying to provide a better life for them.

Some places get more days off than we do here, which would be great for those occasions, if you dont you do what you have to. Put your family first, because you can find another job, you'll never get those moments back.

 

[moreluck]

Another point.....maybe a bit off topic.....but for working moms, especially ups working moms....if you have sons, you are imparting to them a work ethic that cannot be taught in any college in America.

Maybe it will help to change the attitudes out there later when they are grown. The attitude that men can walk away from kids and not work towards supporting them. Teaching our sons good hard work ethics will stop the dead beat dads in the future. I keep my fingers crossed for this.

Deadbeat dads are a pet-peeve of mine dealing with 2 daughters who were married to creeps and who don't support their kids (my grandkids). Both my daughters work very hard to raise their kids. One of them runs her own lawn service business (alone). They learned their work ethic from their dad slaving away at UPS and me holding jobs everywhere we moved.

 

[toonertoo]

Another point.....maybe a bit off topic.....but for working moms, especially ups working moms....if you have sons, you are imparting to them a work ethic that cannot be taught in any college in America.

Maybe it will help to change the attitudes out there later when they are grown. The attitude that men can walk away from kids and not work towards supporting them. Teaching our sons good hard work ethics will stop the dead beat dads in the future. I keep my fingers crossed for this.

Deadbeat dads are a pet-peeve of mine dealing with 2 daughters who were married to creeps and who don't support their kids (my grandkids). Both my daughters work very hard to raise their kids. One of them runs her own lawn service business (alone). They learned their work ethic from their dad slaving away at UPS and me holding jobs everywhere we moved.

I totally agree moreluck, not to make this about me, my time has come and gone. but maybe try to help xkingx, and Ms spoken, who I know are doing this job, and living with the guilt that society puts on working moms. I had boys, who for the most part had those deadbeat dads. They grow up respecting women, and with a distaste for loafers. And are both borderline workaholics, and bring their work home, but at least they have the ability to do some work from home. As we do not. One son has four children and is the BEST dad in the world as he grew up without one. His wife stays at home and they make it just fine. But they knew when I didnt make it to stuff, it wasnt coz I was out partying, I was working, and thats a big difference. Actually they would try to make me go out on the weekends. But I got that out of my system early, not quite early enough, but I wanted to be home when I could. Going out wasnt on my list of things to do back then, I was also going to college, more time away from home. Both of my boys have better degrees than I and they paid for them. They never even thought about quitting school or not going to college. And both did it more timely than I. So whether they learned through example, Id like to think so, but I always still feel bad for all I missed, but when I bring it up, they always say, stop Mom, you did great for all you were doing back then. Then I am comforted. Thats very rewarding. Kids will understand alot more than we give them credit for.

 

[helenofcalifornia]

Tooner, that's where I lucked out, heving my immediate family in the area so they were my number 1 back-up system ALL the time. I can't imagine having to call the babysitter or day care person and telling them I am going to be two hours late, do you mind? And Tie, I am talking about UPS and the hours because this is a UPS discusion board and not where I can compare my lousy hours to another worker's lousy hours. And we have been told by management up here in Norcal that business is going to be 17% above 2005 Christmas and will be running the same plan for 2006 Christmas. What good is it to make all that money if you are too tired to go to the mall on the weekend and spend it? Thank God for computer billpay and catalog shopping. (And I wonder why business is up 17% this Christmas!!)

 

[moreluck]

speaking of shopping....gift cards are great because you can go shop after Xmas and get twice as much.......and it'll all fit!!

 

[xkingx]

I can only hope for that Toonertoo...Sounds like you did a good job!!

Helen thats how I do 95% of my Xmas shopping..Some people might just get those gift cards this year

 

[satellitedriver]

I totally agree moreluck, not to make this about me, my time has come and gone. but maybe try to help xkingx, and Ms spoken, who I know are doing this job, and living with the guilt that society puts on working moms. I had boys, who for the most part had those deadbeat dads. They grow up respecting women, and with a distaste for loafers. And are both borderline workaholics, and bring their work home, but at least they have the ability to do some work from home. As we do not. One son has four children and is the BEST dad in the world as he grew up without one. His wife stays at home and they make it just fine. But they knew when I didnt make it to stuff, it wasnt coz I was out partying, I was working, and thats a big difference. Actually they would try to make me go out on the weekends. But I got that out of my system early, not quite early enough, but I wanted to be home when I could. Going out wasnt on my list of things to do back then, I was also going to college, more time away from home. Both of my boys have better degrees than I and they paid for them. They never even thought about quitting school or not going to college. And both did it more timely than I. So whether they learned through example, Id like to think so, but I always still feel bad for all I missed, but when I bring it up, they always say, stop Mom, you did great for all you were doing back then. Then I am comforted. Thats very rewarding. Kids will understand alot more than we give them credit for.

If it means anything, I respect you and am proud of the way you raised your children. It was the way I and my siblings were raised,through example not preaching. They understand ,because your efforts came from love not just need. I think you made the world a better place by the way you raised your kids.

 

[Mustang Sally]

Hello there, I am new to the group and it's good to be here! I do not work for UPS but my husband does, we have been together for 10 years. I can tell you from experience that it can be hard to be a spouse of a UPS driver. My husband is a spotter at the center, and an air driver, he goes in to work at 2:45 am Tue-Fri and at 6am on Saturday. It's difficult working out our routine, he sleeps in shifts, 4 hours in the afternoon, and 4 hours at night. We eat dinner together around 8pm and he goes back to bed. I am alone a lot, of course he is gone when I get up, and asleep when I come home from my 8-5 job. Over time we have gotten used to it and it's not so bad. I have "me" time, and so does he while I am at work. Like most of you I'm sure that December is the hardest month, between all the OT and the holiday gatherings it gets rough. I have to say that I am understanding, this is what my husband wants to do. He aspires to be a feeder driver and I plan to stand by him through that too. The benefits far outweigh the negatives and it's worth it. I am not a stay at home Mom, we have no kids, I work a full time job, so it's not all about the cash, it's mostly about supporting my husband's career whatever it may be. Of course on the other hand, where else can you make this kind of money, and get this cheap of health insurance, this much time off, etc. etc without a college degree? Not too many places, especially where we live.

So there you go, the perspective of one UPS wife.

 

[trickpony1]

Sally-
You are to be commended for standing by your husband. especially if he is intent on feeders which will be night work for many years. I've seen too many divorces of feeder drivers because they had to work into the depths of night.

On the positive side, if you are in an area that is hiring feeder drivers rapidly to accomadate(sp) the peak season and/or all the loads coming off the train, your husband could possibly bypass many years in package cars thereby extending his health and life.

I wish him luck with his aspirations.

P.S.- welcome to the "cafe" from a 25+ year feeder driver.

 

[trickpony1]

Sally-
just an afterthought.........

Have your husband sign every feeder bid sheet he sees. Not qualified? It doesn't matter.......sign anyway.

He also may want to go by the feeder dispatch office in his facility and make friends with dispatcher/management. Sometimes cordial chats and breakroom banter can be fruitful.

 

[UPSers Wife]

I think I found my support group today! I'm new to this forum but I'm liking what I'm reading.
My hubby and I have been married for 13 yrs. The first few years were rough because I didn't understand the stress he is under as a pkg car driver as well as a steward. Three kids later the stress is still there but I've learned to listen and help him find ways to leave work at work. He loves the work just not the flack from management.
I feel awful that he doesn't get the time with kids that he deserves. Sometimes I feel guilty that I'm the one that gets to take them to the park & attend all the school functions. But I also get all the yuck jobs too. It's like a single mom on welfare(but the checks are better). We've got the retirement date on countdown.
By the way he leaves at 7:30 and sometimes doesn't get home until 8:30. I know his sups don't work that much.

 

[hoser]

I am a single mom whose kids are all grown for the most part (they don't need guidance or advice-just cash!!!), and was reading another of these threads and got to thinking what it would be like to be the spouse of a UPS driver. You know the earliest they will be home is probably 7, they are going to be dirty, tired and probably don't feel like talking. No real time to spend with the kids helping with homework, etc. It's bad enough with what we put up with for the job but what about being on the receiving end of what UPS does to the home life of a driver? I always have had close family around (divorced fairly early on in the career) who helped raise the kids when I wasn't there during the days and evenings. I can't imagine what it would be like if the spouse didn't understand what a driver's life entailed and the work involved. At least feeder drivers are kinda home for the late afternoons for their family. Sorry, just rambling thoughts on life at UPS.....

But the money and benefits they bring in would probably give a spouse the freedom to stay at home raise the kids, do pt consulting work, or better yet, both

Looking at the other side, would you rather have a spouse who works shifts? It has its pros like 4-on 4-off, allows for mixed but balanced weeks (take the kids to school one week, pick them up from school the next, or cook dinner and wish them a good night before going to work) but also its cons, such as the sleeping patterns (for both persons).

Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

 

[brownmonster]

My wife says overtime is 40 plus an hour, what the hell you doing home so early! And while I was sitting here she gave me a shoulder rub. It's as good or as bad as you make it. BM

 

[Ground_Hub_Angel]

"If the trucks aren't full then we aren't making any money." I've heard that a few times at UPS. I understand it and even agree but only to a certain point. Expecting the drivers to be able to work that way all the time is not reasonable. The main problem I see is that too many drivers get away with barely working 8 hours/day. They come in every morning and their shelves "MIGHT" be full but the aisle is totally clear and the floor under the shelves are reasonable. The drivers in that group of people are in between 4:00-5:00 everyday and are never asked for, nor do they offer, their help. There has to be a way to balance the work out across the board. It will never be perfect but there is no reason why so many people have to stay out so late and others get to come in so early. A good example of this is drivers that get in at 4:30 during peak while the rest of the crew is out until 8:00. That is just rediculous.

This has nothing to do with this convo. But the only thing as far as i know that should be in the aisles is hardware, hazmat, and 70+ers. All should fit on the shelves and if not that is unsafe with packages that are not hazmat, hardware, or 70+ lb packages and they should appoint another truck to these areas that have alot more packages. Btw as far as this subject overall they have weekends off, vacations are good, money is good, and to me if you really want to see your spouse you will make time. I work preload and altho at this point getting out of a long and time enduring relationship i do not want to date anyone, this is key to a good relationship. You have to make sacrifices, and this is not high school you are not going to be able to be with your husband 24/7. Although it is hard driver helpers do get good benefits, decent money, and vacations that are very decent. There is a downside to everything whether it be huge or miniscule.

 

[trickpony1]

"....driver helpers do get good benefits, decent money and vacations that are very decent".

You might want to check into this a little further.

 

[keith lestrange]

"If the trucks aren't full then we aren't making any money." I've heard that a few times at UPS. I understand it and even agree but only to a certain point. Expecting the drivers to be able to work that way all the time is not reasonable. The main problem I see is that too many drivers get away with barely working 8 hours/day. They come in every morning and their shelves "MIGHT" be full but the aisle is totally clear and the floor under the shelves are reasonable. The drivers in that group of people are in between 4:00-5:00 everyday and are never asked for, nor do they offer, their help. There has to be a way to balance the work out across the board. It will never be perfect but there is no reason why so many people have to stay out so late and others get to come in so early. A good example of this is drivers that get in at 4:30 during peak while the rest of the crew is out until 8:00. That is just rediculous.

i totally agree !!!!
im one of the 8.00 people and i hate the fact that so many drivers come in bt 500/530/600.
so many colls not done and because im still on road i have to get them.i love my job but its not fair the some guys do all the work and some coast thru the day