Spirit Airlines Installs Ejection Seats For Toddlers Who Take Off Their Masks
MIRAMAR, FL—In order to crack down on the growing pandemic of toddlers not wearing masks after takeoff, Spirit Airlines has announced that all aircraft will now be fitted with ejector seats to quickly remove dangerous maskless babies from the plane.
"We're not messing around anymore," said company CEO Edward M. Christie. "We've had it with these uppity passengers and their uppity babies walking on like they own the place."
MIRAMAR, FL—In order to crack down on the growing pandemic of toddlers not wearing masks after takeoff, Spirit Airlines has announced that all aircraft will now be fitted with ejector seats to quickly remove dangerous maskless babies from the plane.
"We're not messing around anymore," said company CEO Edward M. Christie. "We've had it with these uppity passengers and their uppity babies walking on like they own the place."