Divorce and the Pension

[twoweeled]

It totally depends on who your married to

2nd time around I found a good one

No doubt it depends who you marry. Sorta like, depends which numbers you pick in the Lotto! Maybe you'll win! Depends which numbers you pick.

 

[twoweeled]

If you're in a bad marriage you're gonna be unhappy, that's no secret. The unhappiest guys I know are all in lousy marriages, but by the same token the happiest people I know are all in good marriages. Marriage itself isn't the problem, it's marrying the wrong person for the wrong reasons.

I think it's simpler to say, it marrying the wrong person. I don't think it matters what the reasons are. If it's working, it's working! I wish I could remember where I read/heard this. But I think there's a lot of truth in it. It addressed a much older married couple. The man said:
"When we got married, I think we expected very little, and ended up getting a lot more. I think nowadays, people are expecting a lot more, and getting a lot less."

 

[floridays]

Thanks for relating to my life with a narcissistic Ex UPS man. I, too, finally got my divorce and am enjoying life after 39 years of misery. He basically went crazy when they told him he was "busted"....He could never accept a demotion so chose to retire....I truly believe that's how UPS gets rid of excess pension baggage. He immediately blamed me for everything in his life, disowned me, isolated me from family and friends, then started drinking and bar hopping. He has a seasonal part time job with baseball stadium giving tours, otherwise draws social security and pension. He couldn't control me thru family so started in on removing me from financial stuff, then the courts thru divorce. Narcissism knows no boundaries. At the same time stalking me to maintain that control. I moved out of state to get away. His own daughters have a restraining order against him...and he has seven grandchildren he will never know. I hope for him that the 37 years he put in were truly worth it, and that the "building" will comfort him on his deathbed.

 

[rod]

You've got to have your space. I could never understand how some couples HAVE to do everything together. I know a couple who have ben married forever whos husband can't go to the hardware store to pick up some nuts and bolts without his wife coming along-----usually in matching outfits. Usually this is the kind of husband who couldn't make himself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich by himself and would starve to death if the old lady died before he did.

 

[ColdHarvest]

I'm the spouse of a force-retired UPS manager. We were married 29 years so I get half of everything of everything but because it's pension and 401K money, we had to pay 1,100 to have it audited by a private law firm. Has anyone had any experience in this area? How long does it take? We're divorced since January 4 land I still have no money....what takes UPS so long to audit our Plans?

Typical female. Guy busts his butt, and you somehow deserve half of everything.

Even if he was scummy management, that's still one point higher than your type.

At least he left you after your expiration date. Have fun being an old hag by yourself.

 

[Brownslave688]

That’s right with the drunk unintelligible text about getting laid

 

[JD1988]

Typical female. Guy busts his butt, and you somehow deserve half of everything.

Even if he was scummy management, that's still one point higher than your type.

At least he left you after your expiration date. Have fun being an old hag by yourself.

Typical female. Guy busts his butt, and you somehow deserve half of everything.

Even if he was scummy management, that's still one point higher than your type.

At least he left you after your expiration date. Have fun being an old hag by yourself.

Thanks for that input, typical UPSer male response. If it wasn't for spouses like me making him look good WE would have had nothing long ago. There are those of us out there who sacrifice our own careers for UPS moves and opportunity. And just a side note, UPS also cost him the loss of his three kids and seven grandchildren. What's that worth? I bet no corporation will be by anyone's death bed. He put the company that threw him out before God and family. He deserves to lose all of it not just my half.

 

[burrheadd]

Thanks for that input, typical UPSer male response. If it wasn't for spouses like me making him look good WE would have had nothing long ago. There are those of us out there who sacrifice our own careers for UPS moves and opportunity. And just a side note, UPS also cost him the loss of his three kids and seven grandchildren. What's that worth? I bet no corporation will be by anyone's death bed. He put the company that threw him out before God and family. He deserves to lose all of it not just my half.

PM me hun and we’ll get this sorted out

 

[ColdHarvest]

Thanks for that input, typical UPSer male response. If it wasn't for spouses like me making him look good WE would have had nothing long ago. There are those of us out there who sacrifice our own careers for UPS moves and opportunity. And just a side note, UPS also cost him the loss of his three kids and seven grandchildren. What's that worth? I bet no corporation will be by anyone's death bed. He put the company that threw him out before God and family. He deserves to lose all of it not just my half.

Any time a chick uses "before God" is surely lifting up her skirt where it doesn't belong.

And speaking of God....thought you nutters weren't supposed to care about money?

 

[twoweeled]

I'm the spouse of a force-retired UPS manager. We were married 29 years so I get half of everything of everything but because it's pension and 401K money, we had to pay 1,100 to have it audited by a private law firm. Has anyone had any experience in this area? How long does it take? We're divorced since January 4 land I still have no money....what takes UPS so long to audit our Plans?

I know it's late, but this is not necessarily true. You could have accepted stated amounts he gave you, backed by statements. However, if your attorney demanded and audit, well then that's what took place! When you say "we had to pay $1,100 to have it audited", does that mean, He had to pay $1,100? What ever happened? It should be over now.

 

[burrheadd]

I'm the spouse of a force-retired UPS manager. We were married 29 years so I get half of everything of everything but because it's pension and 401K money, we had to pay 1,100 to have it audited by a private law firm. Has anyone had any experience in this area? How long does it take? We're divorced since January 4 land I still have no money....what takes UPS so long to audit our Plans?

Wat up girrrl!!

 

[twoweeled]

It sounds like you talk to a lot of unhappily married people.

Well isn't that my whole point? "a lot of unhappily married people". Pretty much says it all. I'm not saying there aren't exceptions, but those are exceptions!

 

[UnconTROLLed]

I can only tell you this. It's not always peaches and cream bit it's sire nice to come home to someone that loves you and cares about you.

 

[Leet]

I'm the spouse of a force-retired UPS manager. We were married 29 years so I get half of everything of everything but because it's pension and 401K money, we had to pay 1,100 to have it audited by a private law firm. Has anyone had any experience in this area? How long does it take? We're divorced since January 4 land I still have no money....what takes UPS so long to audit our Plans?

Can I ask you a few questions about your divorce? I’m going thru the same situsyion

 

[burrheadd]

No, an account manager. Couldn't do the computer work any more so they demoted him to a supervisor but he "chose" to retire instead. Then he went nuts and blamed his life on me. Typical narcissist.

you sound like a Karen anyway
He’s lucky to be rid of you

 

[burrheadd]

She’s mean, over 50, and a little crazy. Good luck!

sounds like a good time

 

[burrheadd]

Can I ask you a few questions about your divorce? I’m going thru the same situsyion

talk to me girl I’am one of the best locker room lawyers you’ll ever come across

what seems to be the problem

 

[IVE GOTTA PACKAGE 4U]

talk to me girl I’am one of the best locker room lawyers you’ll ever come across

what seems to be the problem

She needs a vitamin D shot...

 

[burrheadd]

She needs a vitamin D shot...

my specialty

 

[IVE GOTTA PACKAGE 4U]

my specialty

Go get it...