Operational needs
Virescit Vulnere Virtus
What goes in hard and dry, but comes out soft and wet?
Gum!
Gum!
Jokes-Because we could always use a good laugh
- Thread starter Operational needs
- Start date
Operational needs
Virescit Vulnere Virtus
Beer Bottle: “You break me, you get one year of bad luck!”
Mirror: “You kiddin’ me? You break me, then y’all get seven years of bad luck!”
Condom: “Hahaha… (Condom walks off laughing)”
Mirror: “You kiddin’ me? You break me, then y’all get seven years of bad luck!”
Condom: “Hahaha… (Condom walks off laughing)”
Operational needs
Virescit Vulnere Virtus
What’s the difference between your penis and a bonus check?
Someone’s always willing to blow your bonus.
Someone’s always willing to blow your bonus.
Settle down woman
UnionStrong
Sorry, but I don’t care anymore.
Scandalous!
Operational needs
Virescit Vulnere Virtus
A man bought a lie detector robot that slaps people when they lie. He wanted to test the robot.
Dad: Son, come here.
Son: Dad, what?
Dad: Where were you yesterday?
Son: School, of course!
(Robot slaps the son)
Son: I'm sorry dad, I went to a movie.
(Robot slaps the son again)
Son: I'm sorry dad, I watched porn.
Dad: When I was of your age, I don't even know what porn is.
(Robot slaps the dad)
Mom: After all, he is your son. What else can you expect him to do?
(Robot slaps the mom hard!)
Dad: Son, come here.
Son: Dad, what?
Dad: Where were you yesterday?
Son: School, of course!
(Robot slaps the son)
Son: I'm sorry dad, I went to a movie.
(Robot slaps the son again)
Son: I'm sorry dad, I watched porn.
Dad: When I was of your age, I don't even know what porn is.
(Robot slaps the dad)
Mom: After all, he is your son. What else can you expect him to do?
(Robot slaps the mom hard!)
Operational needs
Virescit Vulnere Virtus
Operational needs
Virescit Vulnere Virtus
Operational needs
Virescit Vulnere Virtus
A woman asked a General in the army the last time he made love to a woman, the general stood tall and said "1956 ma'am." The woman, taken back by this answer said "1956?! That long?! Let me make your night better..." and the two sauntered away to a private room. The woman began to strip and the two made passionate love for an hour. The woman cuddled up to the army general afterward and said "well, you sure haven't forgotten any thing since 1956...". The general looked at her confused and said "well I sure hope not. It's only 2130 now!"
UnionStrong
Sorry, but I don’t care anymore.
I really am shocked, that a southern lady could be…..well I never! Lol
Operational needs
Virescit Vulnere Virtus
A woman placed an ad in a news paper.
'I am looking for a male partner who needs to meet these three requirements. He shouldn't beat me. He shouldn't leave me. He should be great in bed.'
Three days later, her door bell rang, and she opened the door to find a man.
The man said, "Hi, I'm Tim. I don't have hands, so I can't beat you. I don't have legs so I can't leave you. I think I'm the guy."
The lady in an angry voice asked him back, "How the hell are you supposed to be great in bed then. Didn't you read the third requirement?"
Tim replied, "I rang the doorbell. Didn't I?"
'I am looking for a male partner who needs to meet these three requirements. He shouldn't beat me. He shouldn't leave me. He should be great in bed.'
Three days later, her door bell rang, and she opened the door to find a man.
The man said, "Hi, I'm Tim. I don't have hands, so I can't beat you. I don't have legs so I can't leave you. I think I'm the guy."
The lady in an angry voice asked him back, "How the hell are you supposed to be great in bed then. Didn't you read the third requirement?"
Tim replied, "I rang the doorbell. Didn't I?"
Operational needs
Virescit Vulnere Virtus
UnionStrong
Sorry, but I don’t care anymore.
Now that’s more befitting a southern belle.
upschuck
Well-Known Member
Doesn't make sense. Boiling water would be steamed, not mist. Smh.
BSWALKS
Fugitive From Reality
She did say a mouthful.
Operational needs
Virescit Vulnere Virtus
At a beach, a slim and sexy girl asked a fat old man if he has Carlsberg or Tuborg beer keg inside his stomach to embarrass him. The old man replied, "I don't know. There's a tap underneath it. Why don't you taste it and tell me?"
Operational needs
Virescit Vulnere Virtus
Guy: I think my wife's cheating on me.
Friend: How do you know?
Guy: She didn't come home last night. When I asked about it, she said she was with her sister Stacey.
Friend: So?
Guy: She was lying. I was with her sister the whole night.
Friend: How do you know?
Guy: She didn't come home last night. When I asked about it, she said she was with her sister Stacey.
Friend: So?
Guy: She was lying. I was with her sister the whole night.
Operational needs
Virescit Vulnere Virtus
- Q. What do tofu and a deeldo have in common? A. They are both meat substitutes.
upsgrunt
Well-Known Member
Is that like a good deal on a vibrator?
Operational needs
Virescit Vulnere Virtus
Did you hear about the guy who died of a Viagra overdose?
They couldn’t close his casket.
They couldn’t close his casket.
