Sayings you never heard before

[stevetheupsguy]

I'm so hungry I could eat the ass-end out of a skunk.

Maybe you should start with something easier........like the dog you maimed!


Sorry for the Hi-Jack, couldn't resist. Now back to the thread.

sing sing caca different smell. Same crap different smell,LOL, my now deceased Aunt used to say this, in a huge spanish accent, all the time.

 

[Sammie]

Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.​

I have kleptomania, but when it gets bad I take something for it.​

FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS!​

Except that one where you're naked in church.

Kinky is using a feather.
Perverted is using the whole chicken.​

 

[BLACKBOX]

When my Gramps was alive I heard him say..(it was pouring rain)...its coming down like cow piss on a flat rock!

 

[UPSNewbie]

I get this one said to me a lot from the older generation since I'm ONLY 6'5":

"I didn't know they stacked sh** that high!"

 

[chev]

My grandmother used to say.."he should be shot with cat chit and hung for stinkin"

Also heard......"you're sweatin like a ferret eatin a hot dog"

 

[trplnkl]

shoot low sheriff, they're ridin' Shetlands

hold her head up Luke, she smell alfalfa

Stronger than Aunt Nanny's breath

 

[tomuchdrama]

that will go over like a fart in church.

 

[stevetheupsguy]

that will go over like a fart in church.

LOL, now I'm gonna be worried as I sit listening to the preacher tomorrow.

 

[moreluck]

There's no preacher at St. Mary Matress's place.

 

[Catatonic]

There's no preacher at St. Mary Matress's place.

Nor at the
International Church Of Pancakes

 

[fethrs]

Be careful what you ask for....you might get it.

I seem to tell people this a lot.

 

[tomuchdrama]

you smell so bad you could knock a buzzard off a ****** wagon.

 

[soberups]

That one went over like a pregnant pole vaulter.

 

[soberups]

That one went over like a turd in a punch bowl.

 

[soberups]

That one went over like a cockroach on a wedding cake.

 

[705red]

Those are my numbers! We dont expect you to meet them!

 

[upsgrunt]

Re: Good? Friday

2 1/2 hours overtime yesterday, glad I didn't make plans. Lately, I don't even think about what will happen. I get to the building, just before start time, change into my browns, and then I deliver till I'm done, whatever time that may be. My motto is starting to be, you can't break water, I just go with the flow.

Or it could be "you can't break water, so you might as well break wind"

 

[bubsdad]

Feel like I been shot at and missed but ***** at and hit.
Screw em if they can't take a joke.
So broke I can't pay attention.
Busier than a two peckered billy goat in a field of nannies.
Beat ya like I own ya.

 

[Molly2]

hotter than a two peckered billy-goat.

My dad would say that. Did you hear "colder than a well digger's ass"?

 

[floridays]

"Stick em up Whitey?"