For Sale or trade

[rod]

What is the price for her on an outright purchase?
(Asking for a friend)
What year model?
All scheduled maintainance?
Clean history report?

2011 Ultra Classic Electraglide
18,000 miles
All services done at local Harley shop everything up to date
Harley synthetic oil since day one
New rear tire last year
Licensed for 2019
Asking $13,400 (but open to offers)

 

[rickyb]

Up for sale or trade is one slightly used wife. She cannot cook or reproduce, she doesn't smoke or drink, she sometimes snores, and she probably has narcolepsy. Will trade for guns, fishing gear, a newer side by side or ATV, gold & silver, or a new metal detector.

A couple weeks ago, she threw out my cast iron pan that I had since before I met her, because I let it get wet and didn't dry it out properly so it got a little rusty. So, yeah...not going to think about that right now. This weekend she thought it would be "fun and cute" to hold a garage / tag / yard sale. She spent the whole week she was off after her surgery going through things to sell. She did quite well gathering up stuff and I even offered up some things for her and her girlfriends to put out. A couple a metal detectors, some tools, books, guns and ammo stuff, some tackle and some other things I could part with.

Friday she calls me at work excited and says, she has already made about $500 and that a couple was interested in her older Kitchen Aid bowl lift mixer and her husband asked about my metal detector. I told her ask $175 for the mixer and $350 for the detector. She said she would go tell them and asked if she should allow them to haggle a little bit or remain firm on the price. I told her she can play around with them but go no lower than $150 for mixer and no lower than $300 for the detector. She hangs up to do her thing.

She calls me back about 45 minutes later giddy like a school girl. She tells me the couple didn't even try to haggle but they did not have that much money in cash on them. Wife tells me they handed her $400 and told her they would be back with the rest in a bit. *mind you, at this point I'm about ready to ask her what was wrong with her for letting the stuff go without payment* She continues to tell me they couldn't hand over the money fast enough and told her they would be back with the balance and asked her to remove the items from the sale so no one else would try to out buy them while they were gone.

I'm like, they just left you $400 and left? She said they left but came back with the balance like they said. She said they didn't even blink an eye when she told them how much she wanted. Once they paid for everything, my wife said they took off outta there happier than a pig in S*. I was pretty excited for her and her friends for having a successful garage sale and was looking forward to helping her on Saturday.

Let's fast forward to yesterday morning. I go out to the garage to get the tables set back up for her then do a little metal detectoring while they were having the sale. I get her stuff set up and go to grab my brand new $2500 metal detector but can't find it in the mess. "Babe, did you or the ladies move my new detector?" She looks at me like I'm the idiot and says, "Well, yeah. I put them all over by the other metal detectors."

Cool...

I look around but don't see it so I asked her where again. She points by the safe. I see other detectors but not my new one. She says, "They are all right there." She then says, "Well, WTF does it look like?" I said it was black and gray and looked like the other ones I guess. *someone hug me now* She says, "Oh, then that's the one that I sold."
....

Me: "Holy friend*, don't tell me you sold my brand new $2500 detector for $350. You're just playing right?"
HER: "I didn't realize it was the expensive new one. I'm sorry but you said the metal detectors in the corner could be sold."
ME: "That one was by the work bench and the box for it was ON the workbench. HOW COULD YOU NOT TELL IT WAS THE NEW ONE?"
HER: "Well you should have said not to touch the one by the workbench. I moved it to make space and put it with all the other detectors.
So, moral of the story is, that everything that happened was MY fault apparently. The well seasoned pan that I had for 20 years got tossed because I LET IT RUST.

I should not have bought an expensive machine and left it sitting around for a bunch of cackling Betties to use for their yard sale.

thought it was a bit funny but you remind of pulp fiction:

did your wife break your fingers in the bedroom?

 

[rod]

Is that a Honda spree scooter?

It's a 1988 Yamaha Razz 50cc scooter I use for a pit bike and other fun stuff

 

[rod]

I got three bikes but no Harleys ... 2 Hondas and a Kawasaki.

I always had Hondas but decided atfer I retired to get a "Hog". When I was looking for a trike I was open to any make but this Harley Tri-Glide came along and I couldn't pass it up for the price he wanted.

 

[scooby0048]

It's a 1988 Yamaha Razz 50cc scooter I use for a pit bike and other fun stuff

Wow, it looks like my old Honda Spree. The very first motor driven anything I ever owned. I used to sneak out at night and ride it over to my girlfriend's house.

But like the girlfriend, I played around on it too much and lost it. One day it was raining out and I was bored so I brought the scooter in the house and put the big kickstand up. I would rev it up and pretend to drive it then all of a sudden, I was bouncing around so much on it the kickstand can down. The scooter back wheel ripped up the carpet and left this big black mark all over it. It shot out from under me and slammed right into the drywall by the TV. There was no way in hell I was getting out of that one.

My mother sold it 3 days later.

 

[Old Man Jingles]

I've paid dearly for the trike. After I bought it my wife decided we needed another bedroom and full bath in the basement for my daughter and her husband even though they have always been perfectly happy staying in my toy hauler when they visit--$24,000. Then she got a new car $20,000 plus her 2014 trade-in. Then she bought one of those new fangled electric assist bicycles--$1,600. (I think she's ahead of me now so I've been looking for a new toy).

I remember you talking about getting a trike because the Ultra was getting to be a much to handle.

 

[Old Man Jingles]

Wow, it looks like my old Honda Spree. The very first motor driven anything I ever owned. I used to sneak out at night and ride it over to my girlfriend's house.

But like the girlfriend, I played around on it too much and lost it. One day it was raining out and I was bored so I brought the scooter in the house and put the big kickstand up. I would rev it up and pretend to drive it then all of a sudden, I was bouncing around so much on it the kickstand can down. The scooter back wheel ripped up the carpet and left this big black mark all over it. It shot out from under me and slammed right into the drywall by the TV. There was no way in hell I was getting out of that one.

My mother sold it 3 days later.

Ah s man, that's a good one! LOL

 

[rod]

I remember you talking about getting a trike because the Ultra was getting to be a much to handle.

You are kind of correct. I thought it was time to put another wheel under me but I still like the two-wheel bikes also. It needs to go (Its a HEAVY bike) but I'm not giving it away. I'm thinking of getting something less heavy to putt around on. The trike is a million times easier to load and unload into the toy hauler. Try loading a 900 lb Harley into a toy hauler a few times and you will understand why it has to go. When I first bought the trailer I Evil Knieveled it up the ramp but for the last 3 or 4 years I had rigged a winch set-up to haul it in. With the trike you drive it up and use reverse to get it out --easy peezy.

 

[25TOLIFE]

Saw her favorite piece of furniture in half and call it even.

 

[clean hairy]

2011 Ultra Classic Electraglide
18,000 miles
All services done at local Harley shop everything up to date
Harley synthetic oil since day one
New rear tire last year
Licensed for 2019
Asking $13,400 (but open to offers)

????
I was asking scooby about his wife on a purchase since he said for sale or trade.
Guess i missed quoting that post.

 

[rod]

????
I was asking scooby about his wife on a purchase since he said for sale or trade.
Guess i missed quoting that post.

I bet she has more than 18,000 miles on her

 

[oldngray]

I bet she has more than 18,000 miles on her

Time for a lube job?

 

[oldngray]

I bet she has more than 18,000 miles on her

@olroadbeech ?

 

[scooby0048]

I bet she has more than 18,000 miles on her

She does. Ridden hard and put away wet.

 

[clean hairy]

She does. Ridden hard and put away wet.

What year model is she?

 

[scooby0048]

What year model is she?

She's a classic.

Born the same year as Sesame Street, The Moon Landing, The Manson crimes, and of course Woodstock.

 

[Operational needs]

She's a classic.

Born the same year as Sesame Street, The Moon Landing, The Manson crimes, and of course Woodstock.

You married an older woman?

 

[clean hairy]

She's a classic.

Born the same year as Sesame Street, The Moon Landing, The Manson crimes, and of course Woodstock.

1969 model.
Is her suspension still in good shape?
When you take her for a ride is she bouncy as though she might need new shock absorbers?

 

[scooby0048]

You married an older woman?

Now tell me princess, why does it sound like you are surprised? Did you think I was into the younger kittens?

Nope, not me. I like the older kitties. They know what they want, aren't afraid to get it, and can actually hold a conversation.

 

[Operational needs]

No. I just assumed you were married to someone around your age. I should have known better. Smart man!