Bologna.
Stories? I know if you retired from UPS, you have a good story or two to tell!
- Thread starter Shiftless
- Start date
Bologna.
Shiftless
Well-Known Member
Its 2 am on a Saturday morning in the late 70's. I am parking trailers at an outlying center. All dark everyone gone. I decide I am going to hook up my empties in the street because it has been raining so hard and the yard was really small and my mirrors were virtually useless.
The street is about 1/2 mile long with one side street that teed into this long street which the building is almost at the end. On the the other side of the street is nothing but farmers fields. Cool part was there was a curb on that side of the street where the dirt went right up to the curb. No sidewalk, no lights, just farmed right up to the curb.
Again I have the engine at idle building air pressure while I am putting the set together. As I back up to put the gear on the back of the front box while lifting the nose of the gear to put it on the trailer I hear this weird sucking sound that when I drop the doughnut on the pintle hook it has my full attention. Sure enough I hear it again 10 seconds later than followed shortly after that a sound like a thud but a splat at the same time comes my way??? Take my flashlight and scan the field? Nothing! I turn and put the locking clasp down on the pintle hook, put the chains on and head up the drivers side of the trailer to hook them together. In typical nobody looking fashion whammo, bango, draggo, Cool I'm hooked! This time I shut the motor off. I walk back look under the 5th wheel on the gear, collar has come around and locking pin visible. Good To go! I back out all bent over to put my supply lines and light cord in but before I can touch anything between the trailer I hear that same sucking, mucking sound real close again with same thud splat noise, but this time I hear a groan noise! WTF! Whip my flashlight over the field and see nothing! Dont hear anything anymore? OK time to get the friend outta here this is ridiculous!!! I cant walk the right side of the trailer as they are right up to the curb. So I leave the middle of the trailers walk to the back, check my lights and air pressures and Bee line it back to the cab.
So I am in the cab for a couple minutes doing my time card when all of a sudden I look up and I see something coming out of the farmers muddy field about 6 feet ahead of tractor maybe a foot away from the curb. It lifts itself up from laying prone face first in the mud by its arms, then it pushes back to get to its knee's and then crawls over the curb and on to the street on its hands and knees still. So I start getting out of the truck and I climb down to help the guy who seems to be having a real hard day! I walk over to assist him and he tells me in an agitated voice in Spanish to leave him alone (at least that what I got out of it) as he pushing me away. He finally gets erect and wham down he goes on his first step, "Here let me help you are wasted" I tell him! The he says something "gringo *&^%" and I said cool you figure it out! He stands up erect again. He is in full dress mode right down to his pointed cowboy boots. Dude was DIALED IN! Just covered in mud everywhere. So now that he has the forward motion thought he starts to move and surprisingly even with 4 inches of mud stuck to the bottom of his boots that would every step leave a print and squish and squirm under him to the point of almost falling down he the wandered down the street.
I still can remember that sucking sound which I assume was him pulling his boot out of the mud to step and that thud, splash sound of what must of been his body and face getting planted.
So! Dont drink and Boot Scoot in farmers fields!
The street is about 1/2 mile long with one side street that teed into this long street which the building is almost at the end. On the the other side of the street is nothing but farmers fields. Cool part was there was a curb on that side of the street where the dirt went right up to the curb. No sidewalk, no lights, just farmed right up to the curb.
Again I have the engine at idle building air pressure while I am putting the set together. As I back up to put the gear on the back of the front box while lifting the nose of the gear to put it on the trailer I hear this weird sucking sound that when I drop the doughnut on the pintle hook it has my full attention. Sure enough I hear it again 10 seconds later than followed shortly after that a sound like a thud but a splat at the same time comes my way??? Take my flashlight and scan the field? Nothing! I turn and put the locking clasp down on the pintle hook, put the chains on and head up the drivers side of the trailer to hook them together. In typical nobody looking fashion whammo, bango, draggo, Cool I'm hooked! This time I shut the motor off. I walk back look under the 5th wheel on the gear, collar has come around and locking pin visible. Good To go! I back out all bent over to put my supply lines and light cord in but before I can touch anything between the trailer I hear that same sucking, mucking sound real close again with same thud splat noise, but this time I hear a groan noise! WTF! Whip my flashlight over the field and see nothing! Dont hear anything anymore? OK time to get the friend outta here this is ridiculous!!! I cant walk the right side of the trailer as they are right up to the curb. So I leave the middle of the trailers walk to the back, check my lights and air pressures and Bee line it back to the cab.
So I am in the cab for a couple minutes doing my time card when all of a sudden I look up and I see something coming out of the farmers muddy field about 6 feet ahead of tractor maybe a foot away from the curb. It lifts itself up from laying prone face first in the mud by its arms, then it pushes back to get to its knee's and then crawls over the curb and on to the street on its hands and knees still. So I start getting out of the truck and I climb down to help the guy who seems to be having a real hard day! I walk over to assist him and he tells me in an agitated voice in Spanish to leave him alone (at least that what I got out of it) as he pushing me away. He finally gets erect and wham down he goes on his first step, "Here let me help you are wasted" I tell him! The he says something "gringo *&^%" and I said cool you figure it out! He stands up erect again. He is in full dress mode right down to his pointed cowboy boots. Dude was DIALED IN! Just covered in mud everywhere. So now that he has the forward motion thought he starts to move and surprisingly even with 4 inches of mud stuck to the bottom of his boots that would every step leave a print and squish and squirm under him to the point of almost falling down he the wandered down the street.
I still can remember that sucking sound which I assume was him pulling his boot out of the mud to step and that thud, splash sound of what must of been his body and face getting planted.
So! Dont drink and Boot Scoot in farmers fields!
Shiftless
Well-Known Member
Are you guys holding your stories in because they bring out to much emotion about the incident? Or are to embarrassed to tell?
Well here is one of my embarrassing stories.
Pkg driver 1976. On an unknown route, in an area I have never delivered. Major street, Pkg car parked right in front of this 4 or 6 story building? I go up the elevator, make a delivery or two. I come down make a turn and WTF? I am in a stock brokers office? Only way I see out is an open sliding door on to a porch that I can see my package car awaiting me across the office front glass, but I don't want to cut thru the maze of low level cubicles to go to that side . So I say go for it on this side as this is the closest way OUT!.
So I size up that I am to embarrassed to go back in after reaching the porch and it does look a little intimidaing and the entry way now blocks the view of the pkg car and what the heck I'm young, besides coming in the drop to the grass is only about 3 feet and the steel railing aint that high. Well it is when one hand holds the rail, one hand holds the clipboard and you hop and throw your legs over only to catch the knee of the last knee going over!
Time moves ahead a minute or so and I have this guy shaking me saying "Hey UPS, you OK?" HUH? What?
He describes to me that I clipped the railing and I spun, landing not on my feet, but my back knocking the air out of me and it put me out for a bit? He then says"Dude that's 5 ft just from floor level" So I get up! Thanking him for what? I don't know? I guess if it was worse he would have called 911.
So now what I you do? I get my composure in the car and decide OK, Just slow down. It slowed me down real good. I made three more stops in a 1/2 hour. Called my sup and told him I was blowing out both ends I'm coming in. He was a cool dude and actually asked me if I could stay where I was at for 5 minutes as he was on the phone with the driver a block away and if I could give my stuff to the other driver, as I had maybe 20 stops left.
Came back the next day and on the same route as a utility driver (still sore as heck)as I approach this building I say " No Wonder" Yup the building does have two long porches along the front on each side of the huge entry way. Problem was, the side I chose to exit was on the down hill side. YUP! Building was a hill. So as the guy shaking me explained to me, that's a "five foot" drop with now estimated 36 to 40 inch railing. HE was right. I had parked the day before on the other side where if it was 3 feet would be exaggerating closer to 2 ft.
Different times! This supervisor was the coolest dude ever! He was a real people's guy! That's why he didn't last. I did not tell him what really happened at the time, I just went home sick. I did throw up on route walking in from the back of a liquor store parking lot in their trash can once, thinking some juice would help all the light headed feelings and was pale as hell, looked bad when I got back to the center, felt worse as I was also sore as heck. I actually told him month's later when he told me in the morning it was his last day and knew once he told his manager he was quitting he would be walked off the property. He laughed with me when I told him what happened. That was the last time I saw him.
This event taught me to SLOW DOWN!
Well here is one of my embarrassing stories.
Pkg driver 1976. On an unknown route, in an area I have never delivered. Major street, Pkg car parked right in front of this 4 or 6 story building? I go up the elevator, make a delivery or two. I come down make a turn and WTF? I am in a stock brokers office? Only way I see out is an open sliding door on to a porch that I can see my package car awaiting me across the office front glass, but I don't want to cut thru the maze of low level cubicles to go to that side . So I say go for it on this side as this is the closest way OUT!.
So I size up that I am to embarrassed to go back in after reaching the porch and it does look a little intimidaing and the entry way now blocks the view of the pkg car and what the heck I'm young, besides coming in the drop to the grass is only about 3 feet and the steel railing aint that high. Well it is when one hand holds the rail, one hand holds the clipboard and you hop and throw your legs over only to catch the knee of the last knee going over!
Time moves ahead a minute or so and I have this guy shaking me saying "Hey UPS, you OK?" HUH? What?
He describes to me that I clipped the railing and I spun, landing not on my feet, but my back knocking the air out of me and it put me out for a bit? He then says"Dude that's 5 ft just from floor level" So I get up! Thanking him for what? I don't know? I guess if it was worse he would have called 911.
So now what I you do? I get my composure in the car and decide OK, Just slow down. It slowed me down real good. I made three more stops in a 1/2 hour. Called my sup and told him I was blowing out both ends I'm coming in. He was a cool dude and actually asked me if I could stay where I was at for 5 minutes as he was on the phone with the driver a block away and if I could give my stuff to the other driver, as I had maybe 20 stops left.
Came back the next day and on the same route as a utility driver (still sore as heck)as I approach this building I say " No Wonder" Yup the building does have two long porches along the front on each side of the huge entry way. Problem was, the side I chose to exit was on the down hill side. YUP! Building was a hill. So as the guy shaking me explained to me, that's a "five foot" drop with now estimated 36 to 40 inch railing. HE was right. I had parked the day before on the other side where if it was 3 feet would be exaggerating closer to 2 ft.
Different times! This supervisor was the coolest dude ever! He was a real people's guy! That's why he didn't last. I did not tell him what really happened at the time, I just went home sick. I did throw up on route walking in from the back of a liquor store parking lot in their trash can once, thinking some juice would help all the light headed feelings and was pale as hell, looked bad when I got back to the center, felt worse as I was also sore as heck. I actually told him month's later when he told me in the morning it was his last day and knew once he told his manager he was quitting he would be walked off the property. He laughed with me when I told him what happened. That was the last time I saw him.
This event taught me to SLOW DOWN!
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Maple Grove MN Driver
Cocaine Mang!
The cargo area of my Package Car was essentially a mobile brothel
burrheadd
KING Of GIFS
Shiftless
Well-Known Member
Who said anything about a cell phone?
Pay phones were everywhere and I think at that time it was still a dime to make a call.
upschuck
Well-Known Member
We had an 800# to call the center
oldupsman
Well-Known Member
Might have been a quarter in 76. I doubt that burrhead even knows what a payphone is or that they
even existed. Heck, they were on every corner.
oldupsman
Well-Known Member
Same here. If you had a problem you went to a pay phone and called in.
upschuck
Well-Known Member
Wonder if they still work. Can't for the life of me remember what it was. Think it ended in 2424, but probably wrong.
Shiftless
Well-Known Member
About 6 months ago I was at Hendrys Beach in Santa Barbara with my Brothers and we ran into my one Bothers ex wife. Nice gal, Bitter divorce, they were young, but they are now all grown up (I take that back, except my Brother) and she is still a Hippy chick. Good looking one even today!!
Any who, I tell them I want to take a picture with my cell phone and they cuddle up like its the 60's and I take the shot. When I look at it I start chuckling as I didn't really pay attention to it when I shot it. They haven't picked up on it yet so I just let them look at the picture on my phone and they all do the same thing once they see it, they all turn and look at the pay phone. Yup! A stand alone, old school pay phone in the picture. We all got a laugh out of it and it became the next topic of conversation as to when did you last see a pay phone?
Ancient Alien
UPS Vacation
I got one! It's about 30-years ago on a Friday night. An extended driver comes in and asks me to tell him if any auditors come in. This was back with paper/no tracking those days. This particular driver had a HOT date that night but had a 90-minute shag. That's a stop 45-minutes one way. So he pulls over on the highway... rain bags the pkg by a pile of rocks and he'll snag it Monday to deliver. It was just some Burpee Seed parcel and he figured they'd be ok getting it Monday. Well over the weekend it snows 18" and when he got to the location he was sure he left it. The snow plows have been there burying it further. Like a scene out of Fargo he dug & dug for 45-minutes until he found it.
Now that's some funny stuff right there boyz! Hahaha
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Ancient Alien
UPS Vacation
I like you olroadbeech, but your story is disturbing. I wonder if he coughed up $50k or $75k if you would of then helped him out. Yet, this Revelation from you is fine. I don't live in the Wally or Upstate area or the Sacramento area to understand your guys feelings of old west justice. Yet it is disturbing to hear stuff like this.
I know you're just relating a story... but damn. That crosses the line imo. Amazing!
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Jkloc420
Do you need an air compressor or tire gauge
hi dave
Ancient Alien
UPS Vacation
My messages are about 65% accurate or what I said.
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olroadbeech
Happy Verified UPSer
most people are just talkers. i knew he wasn't 100% serious. he was a little unhinged and ended up quitting a great job anyway.
i think he was having an affair with her and she probably threatened to go to his wife. you never know. he may have been serious but not 50k serious.
other than that, UPS is a pretty boring place.
I have a story that is better than yours. This driver had a rural route where the wrong 3 stops may take 2 hours. Back when we were on paper he would leave some packages at a pickup for “storage” with plans to deliver them the next day. His plan worked multiple times until there was a fire in the building where he left the packages. About 2 weeks later tracers started coming in for those “hot” packages. I don’t think LP ever figured it out.
Bologna.
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