Now we are getting philosophical haha.
I think we disagree re: the influence/control a society (call it a way of life, culture, etc) exercises over its members. Yes, of course, capitalism, government, etc would not exist without our participation or, perhaps more accurately, our resignation and our thwarted sense of dignity. At the same time it is not as if any of us has enjoyed great latitude to live otherwise and it is certainly the case that we have been shaped, molded, and trained to an extensive degree by these forces -- from birth onward. The whole is more decisive than the parts that constitute it. As with the force of gravity, the whole sets the parts into an orderly motion.
What I mean is we are not independent atoms in a vacuum. No different than ancestors, we are born into a complex set of circumstances that we did not set into motion and did not choose. In order to survive, we must mostly reproduce those circumstances. Take for example the advent of industrialization/capitalism. Based on history, it seems that the people who have found factory life, the life based on commodity production/capital accumulation (the life we inhabit to the Nth degree now), the most intolerable, and mounted the greatest resistance to it, are the first generations exposed to it. Of course their resistance was not successful, or was co-opted, e.g., the communist/socialist states. Later generations adapt: what else is there do after defeat? Obviously we are highly adaptable creatures. For better and, perhaps, worse.
As a final analogy, ways of life are like languages. Strictly speaking people don't 'invent' languages, and consider how well invented languages have been adopted, e.g., Esperanto. Pretty similar to the case of 'intentional communities', communes, and the like. However. By speaking and writing, people do change languages -- largely as an unintended consequence, and largely the changes are superficial. We might not understand all that the kids are saying, but we recognize the tongue. Me, I'm foolish enough to seek a new 'language' because I don't find this one terribly free. I see no better path toward that than simply drifting. I understand that reaching it is unlikely and as far from my control as yours and the next person.