True story: I knew a guy who was homeless for 17 years. At the time I met him, he had been sober for 11 years. He said, "Do you know why I was homeless for all those years?" I said, "No, why?" He said, "Because people kept giving me money... I'd go buy a 40oz, pound it, get drunk, and pass out behind the dumpster next to 7/11. I did that every single day, for 17 years. Now I have a wife, a 2 story house, two cars that are paid off"
What seems like help, isnt always helpful my dude, and youll learn that as you get older. But right now youre either really young or really naive. You want to be the hero of your story but you arent, so you just tell a story that makes you the hero, in your mind anyways.